“The most effective form of parental counseling that we can give the members of our congregations may not be how we counsel them in their moment of crisis but, rather, the style of leadership we ourselves exhibit daily regarding our own “charges” in the congregation, particularly our capacity to define ourselves. At the very least, if we are not aware of this connection, we may undercut our “sage” pastoral efforts, well-meaning though they may be.”
- Edwin Friedman, “Generation to Generation”